The Hidden Crisis Behind the 'Male Crisis' Narrative

Last November in Washington, D.C., politicians, researchers, nonprofit leaders, and journalists packed into a conference room for the Symposium on Young American Men. The crowd—mostly older white men in crisp suits—had gathered around a single question: What should we do about this troubled and downtrodden population?

For years now, the plight of young men has commanded public attention. College attendance and graduation rates have declined. Large numbers of working-age men, especially young ones, are unemployed. Jarring statistics show men dying from "deaths of despair"—suicide, overdose, and alcoholic liver disease.

Experts like Richard Reeves, author of Of Boys and Men, have built entire think tanks around this crisis. NYU's Scott Galloway regularly discusses modern manhood on podcasts. Their diagnosis is consistent: men have lost their sense of purpose and identity as manufacturing jobs disappeared, "toxic masculinity" critiques spread, and breadwinner expectations became impossible to meet.

The Comparison Trap

By many measures, they're right. Young men are struggling more than they used to. But this narrative often morphs into a different claim: that young men are struggling more than young women.

In these discussions, women appear mainly as symbols of success—the ones more likely to attend college, maintain close friendships, avoid drugs and alcohol, and graduate high school. They're used to make a point about male disadvantage.

The problem? In numerous ways, young women are actually doing worse.

The Silent Struggle

Women have long reported higher rates of depression and anxiety than men. A 2024 study across 34 countries found women's mental health was worse than men's across multiple measures—fear, anxiety, suicidality, and feelings of overwhelm.

While more men die by suicide, women are significantly more likely to attempt it. The discrepancy stems largely from men choosing more lethal means like firearms.

At the men's symposium, a female panelist mentioned suicide statistics for young men, then added almost parenthetically that the rate was even higher for women. The comment hung in the air. The conference moved on.

The Achievement Paradox

The idea that women are thriving stems largely from academic success. Pew Research found 47% of women have bachelor's degrees compared to 37% of men—a gap referenced in virtually every "masculinity crisis" discussion.

But this striving comes at enormous cost. Harvard Graduate School of Education researchers surveyed roughly 700 adults aged 18-25 in 2022. Women were significantly more likely to report achievement pressure, with over 60% saying it negatively affected them. Women also hold about two-thirds of America's student loan debt.

That effort doesn't always pay off. A woman with a bachelor's degree earns roughly the same as a man with an associate's degree. Even within the same field, men with bachelor's degrees out-earn women with identical qualifications.

Meg Jay, a clinical psychologist specializing in young adults, told me many female clients work themselves ragged in college expecting career success—only to face "an unwelcome shock" in the workforce. They look around companies and see men occupying leadership positions, realizing high-paying fields remain male-dominated.

A Hostile World

Young adulthood is difficult regardless of gender—a time of uncertainty, high stakes, and the daunting task of building meaningful lives from scratch. Modern challenges like housing shortages, brutal job markets, and collapsing social trust don't help anyone.

But today's world is especially hostile to women. Manosphere influencers and politicians exploit young men's vulnerability while stirring resentment against women. Gen Z men are less likely than their grandfathers to support gender equality. Constitutional abortion rights are gone, and funding cuts have further weakened reproductive healthcare access.

Meika Loe, a Colgate University sociology professor, says many female students are grieving the loss of bodily autonomy. "Their generation grew up watching The Handmaid's Tale, maybe reading it. But now they're living it."

A Gallup poll found 40% of U.S. women aged 15-44 would move abroad permanently if given the chance—four times higher than in 2014 and double the rate of male respondents.

Identity in Crisis

Many young women were told as girls they could do anything they set their minds to. Then they entered adulthood just in time to witness backlash against their equal worth, watching promises of power recede right when they reached for it.

Today's young women struggle to understand whether they're expected to be CEOs or mothers of five, valued for their thoughts or looks or ability to support husbands. As Jay notes, people this age think about what others believe they should do rather than what's right for them.

One of Jay's clients went to an Ivy League college but now struggles to find work. Looking around, she sees successful women aren't the highly educated ones but tradwives and beauty influencers. "Why did I work so hard in school if this is what people want for me?" she wonders.

Many young women don't know whether to prioritize "hitting the gas pedal at work" or becoming mothers. They often feel alone in these decisions while men around them aren't pushed to consider the grueling reality of balancing work and family.

The Quiet Crisis

What young women are experiencing is both an identity crisis and a mental health crisis. But it's rarely recognized as either, perhaps because it's quieter—this population may not be happy, but it's high-functioning and therefore easier to ignore.

Loe recalled a medical sociology saying: "Men die quicker, but women are sicker." Women are more likely to endure chronic illnesses and soldier on with their pain unnoticed. Or maybe their turmoil isn't quiet at all—perhaps American society is simply more tolerant of women suffering because they always have.

Hardship shouldn't be a competition. But recognizing all forms of struggle might be the first step toward actually solving them.