Trump's First Cabinet Casualty: The Rise and Fall of Kristi Noem

In her autobiography, Kristi Noem recounted the harrowing decision to shoot her hunting dog Cricket. The ill-fated pet had ruined a hunting trip and killed the neighbor's chickens. "It was not a pleasant job," she wrote, "but it had to be done."

One year later, Noem found herself in Cricket's position. President Trump fired her as Homeland Security Secretary this week, making her the first Cabinet member to be removed from his second administration.

A Year of Scandals

Noem managed to generate more scandals in one year than most presidencies accumulate in four. Her department approved $220 million in contracts for advertisements featuring herself warning illegal immigrants of deportation. One contract went to a firm with ties to Noem, whose CEO is married to her former spokesperson.

While spending lavishly to promote herself as a ruthless law enforcer, Noem lived in high style. Her department leased a luxurious plane equipped with a queen bed, kitchen, four televisions, and a bar. The official justification? It would serve "dual missions—both as ICE deportation flights and for cabinet level travel"—a curious expense for a department that otherwise delights in mistreating detainees.

Noem's sensitivity to travel discomfort became legendary. When a maintenance issue forced her to switch planes and the pilot forgot to transfer her blanket, he was fired on the spot, only to be reinstated because no one else was available to fly her home.

The $100,000 Bottleneck

While spending DHS resources profligately on herself, Noem subjected the rest of the department to ruinous parsimony. She issued a memo requiring her personal approval for any expense over $100,000, creating a bottleneck that delayed more than 1,000 contracts and disaster-relief grants.

At the center of many problems was Corey Lewandowski. Trump had blocked his former aide from serving as Noem's chief of staff, partly over concerns about their alleged romantic relationship—a claim both deny. Both are married, but not to each other.

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Lewandowski circumvented this ban by becoming a special government employee, legally limited to working no more than 130 days per year for the federal government. Axios reported he evaded this limit by having DHS employees let him into buildings without swiping his card. Despite his supposedly part-time role, he functioned as the department's co-head.

The Fatal Error: Pointing Fingers Upward

At yesterday's House hearing, Noem repeatedly declined under oath to deny having a romantic relationship with Lewandowski. "I am shocked that we're peddling tabloid garbage in this committee today," she said angrily but evasively.

But Noem's fatal error wasn't infidelity, incompetence, or self-enrichment—sins Trump might understand. What killed her was pointing the finger at her boss.

Noem had leaked to reporters that adviser Stephen Miller gave her bad information leading her to accuse Alex Pretti of "domestic terrorism" after immigration agents shot and killed the Minnesota man. She also claimed Trump had approved her controversial ad campaign.

This statement reportedly infuriated the president so deeply that he publicly contradicted it and began calling Republicans to discuss firing Noem.

The Sacred Principle of Deniability

Whether Noem was telling the truth is beside the point. Trump, trained by mob lawyer Roy Cohn, famously avoids written orders and looks askance at lawyers who take notes during meetings. To publicly implicate him in the chain of responsibility violates what appears to be his most sacred principle: plausible deniability.

Cricket was shot for yapping uncontrollably, bungling the mission, and killing innocent bystanders. Noem's misdeeds are remarkably similar, though she'll be treated more mercifully. Trump announced he'll install his deposed homeland security secretary as "Special Envoy for The Shield of the Americas"—a new and apparently vital position coincidentally set to be announced this weekend.

As Trump might put it, she was fired like a dog—but given a golden parachute.