'Sad Beige Children' and 'iPad Parenting': The Modern Childrearing Trends Parents Are Calling 'Downright Harmful'
Parents online are calling out modern childrearing trends they find harmful, from 'gentle parenting' turning into permissive parenting to 'sad beige children' and screen time.
In Brief
When an online forum asked parents to name a modern childrearing trend they find harmful, thousands responded with surprising candor. From turning children into social media content to the misunderstanding of 'gentle parenting,' the discussion revealed a deep-seated anxiety about the pressures and pitfalls of raising kids today.
A simple question recently sparked a massive online debate: “What modern childrearing ‘trend’ do you think is downright harmful?” The flood of responses from parents around the world paints a clear picture of the anxieties surrounding modern parenting, where good intentions often seem to clash with common sense.
The Digital Dilemma: 'Sharenting' and Screen Time
Unsurprisingly, the impact of technology and social media dominated the conversation. The top-voted concern was "over-sharing kids’ lives on social media." One user explained, “Turning children into content before they can consent messes with their privacy, safety, and sense of identity... and the internet never forgets.” Another user criticized the trend of filming a child crying for "awareness," calling it "just exploitation with a filter."
The use of screens as a pacifier, often dubbed 'iPad parenting' or the 'tablet babysitter,' also drew heavy criticism. "These machines are making our children dumber and likely to be servile," one commenter warned. "They won’t develop their critical thinking skills and some can become weird tech zombies."
The Great 'Gentle Parenting' Debate
The concept of 'gentle parenting' proved to be a major flashpoint. Many argued that the philosophy is often misinterpreted and poorly executed. "Gentle parenting turning into no parenting," one viral comment stated bluntly. "Ma'am, that child needs boundaries, not a podcast." Another user added their frustration with parents who refuse to ever say 'no' for fear of 'traumatizing' their children.
However, others rushed to defend the true principles of the approach, distinguishing it from what they call 'permissive parenting.' As one user clarified, "Permissive parenting is where the kid runs the show and has no boundaries... Gentle parenting should come with boundaries, natural consequences, [and] discussion about behavior: it’s not for the lazy."
The Pitfalls of Perfectionism and Protection
A recurring theme was the pressure to raise a perfect, optimized child. One user lamented the trend of "treating kids like a project to optimize instead of people who are allowed to be bored, messy, and human." This extends to the playground, where 'helicopter parents' trail their kids, constantly narrating and intervening. "LET YOUR KID PLAY," one frustrated observer wrote. "Let them fall, let them try, let them be scared, let them have their own wins."
Other trends that made the list included the aesthetic-driven "sad beige children" trend, which some argue deprives kids of stimulating colors, unqualified homeschooling, and blaming teachers for a child's own shortcomings.
PRISM Insight: This widespread discussion highlights a fundamental tension in modern parenting: the conflict between protecting children and preparing them for reality. Many well-intentioned trends—from curating a perfect online image to shielding kids from any discomfort—are now being viewed by a growing number of parents as counterproductive. They argue these trends inadvertently foster dependence, reduce resilience, and compromise privacy. The core message is a call to shift focus from the performance of 'perfect parenting' back to the practical goal of raising capable, independent human beings.
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